Day 357 - All Girls Love Shoes - Don't They? Part 3

This is a continuation on from days 355, 356  - Today I am going to look at childhood memories that have come up whereby I programmed myself through advertising and media and conditioning of how to be a good consumer as a woman in this reality, and within this I developed very early on an desire and want for clothing, but specifically shoes.




Here I walk the self forgiveness on memories that are coming up:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to programme myself as a good consumer.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a belief within and as me that I need to have certain items of clothing and shoes to fit in and be desired or attractive in this reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dress up in my Mothers or Grandmothers clothes  - specifically shoes.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become excited within and as me when I was given my very first pair of heels, for dressing up at around age 6.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to cripple my feet, to the point that I am in absolute agony and can't walk any longer for the sake of fashion and sexy footwear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get a kind of 'kick' out of high heels in that they accentuate my legs and make me taller. Thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a belief within and as me that I will be taken more seriously and if I am taller than others and within this I see that I have some authority over them because I am towering above them, or am the same height as most men. Thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a 'power dresser' because I am wearing heels and I am almost six foot.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to derive pleasure from owning a pair of high heels and then trying to find a nice outfit to wear with them and within this place so much attention  on what I was going to look like, that I have missed the point of the occasion and spent so much time in my mind planing my outfit, so that I will attract attention and 'feel' good about myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to pile tissues and plasters into my shoes to stop them rubbing my feet, and to continue to wear the shoes all along knowing that they are going to hurt me. Thus within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to literally fear wearing a certain pair of shoes, because I have known that after an hour I will be in pain and wish I hadn't worn them, but yet I allow myself to tell myself that it doesn't matter because they will look great.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put fashion first - over and above my own welfare and human physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as stupid for falling hook, line and sinker into the pre programmed design of womanhood, and within this I have told myself off and felt regretful that I didn't consider my feet first....



To continue...